Self-regulation seems to be a big buzz word in the education environment, but many people are still unsure of what it is exactly. To put it simply, self-regulation is the nervous system’s response to stress. Think of it like this: when our bodies are in a calm, relaxed state, we are regulated. When our bodies are exposed to stress, fear, or overpowering emotion, we can become dysregulated. There has been a lot of research in the areas of neuroscience and psychology that are giving us a better picture of what happens INSIDE our bodies when our body perceives a stressful or threatening situation, so let’s get into it! We can’t start to helping childrenwho are dysregulated if we don’t understand the processes that are happening in their bodies WHEN they are dysregulated.
One of the theories that has provided a wealth of information in this area is the polyvagal theory. It was developed by Dr. Stephen Porges. The vagus nerve runs from your brain stem to your stomach and is charge of some of our automatic body functions such as breathing and heart rate. It is also in charge of things like relaxation, that flight-fight-freeze response, and social interactions.
If you think of your brain as having two parts, it makes it easier to see what happens when we become dysregulated. Make a fist and tuck your thumb inside the closed fist. Then put your other hand on top of your fist. Yes, we have different lobes and areas of our brains, but for this example, think of it as more inner vs. outer brain. Our inner or deep brain (our limbic system) is in charge of what we need to survive (remembering experiences that made us feel good or were unsafe, affect, stress regulation, and sensations). Think of the outer part of our brain as our thinking brain is how we are able to problem solve, process, think, and use language.
When someone encounters a stressful (or perceived stressful) situation, the amygdala (which is kind of like our body’s smoke detector) sends out the alarm and the body responds. Our bodies are MADE to respond to stress, it is a survival skill (which is why we have the flight, fight, freeze response). This is an evolutionary response to stress to make sure we survive. The problem is our brain cannot differentiate the stress between outrunning a lion and being stuck in traffic.
Here’s an overview of how it happens. You are stuck in traffic and stressed that you are going to be late for work. Your amygdala sends the alarm to the hippocampus, which then quickly accesses memories stroed in our brains as safe or unsafe (think of a long drawer in a file cabinet). If it is deemed as unsafe, the amygdala then sends a signal to the hypothalamus, who then sends the necessary information to flee, fight, or freeze to the rest of your body through your autonomic nervous system. Your autonomic nervous system has two parts – the sympathetic nervous system and the parasympathetic nervous system. When the hypothalamus sends out it’s signal, your brain is focused only on surviving that stressful situation and as such your access to the area of your brain such as problem solving or language is not available. It is so automatic that your brain starts this process before it even has a visual perception of what is happening. Think of people who jump in front of a moving bus, run into a house fire, or are able to lift a car to save someone. Their outer or thinking brain did not problem solve what to do, their body just responded based on the signals sent by their brain.
Tying all of this into the behavior chain analysis model (trigger-thought-action-consequence) can give us a better picture of what happens to our kids when they “flip their lids” as Dr. Jody Carrington says in her book “Kids These Days”, and just how quickly it can happen.
Trigger – A child encounters a stressful (or perceived stressful) situation and the amygdala sends the signal to the hippocampus.
Thought -The hippocampus sends the signal that this event is similar to one that the child has experienced before, which was stressful, traumatic, or uncomfortable.
Action – The child flees (avoidance), fights (verbally, physcially, or damages property), or freezes (shuts down).
Consequence – What then happens to them as a result of that whole cycle that either reaffirms that what happened was stressful and unsafe or can help them form new memories over time to differentiate more between safe and unsafe behaviors.
So what do we do to help kids during that cycle? We will explore this more in depth in the next blog but for starters, we can make sure to help the child feel safety and offer empathy (this does not mean we do not still hold the boundary for them).
Here are some of my favorite places to learn more about self-regulation and our body’s biological responses to stress and trauma:
Self-Reg: How to Help Your Child (and You) Break the Stress Cycle and Successfully Engage with Life
The Whole Brain Child – Dr. Dan Siegel and Dr. Tina Payne Bryson
References used for this blog post: Limbic System: Amygdala, Hypothalamus, Thalamus (thoughtco.com), Understanding the stress response – Harvard Health, The thinking brain versus the emotional brain – Thoughts on Life and Love, and information from starr.org from their trauma and resilience certification classes.
I would love to hear your thoughts or experiences with this! Please be sure to leave them in the comments.
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